Frozen Fog

The weather is best described as frozen fog. It is cold, wet and very still. It seems to be drawing the life out of the town. Everyone is hunched, heads down, hands in pockets. walking quickly to wherever they are headed. No one is stopping to greet a neighbor. Even the dogs seem to be about business, and not stopping to sniff. They say it should last a while longer. The air quality might get bad. It has been interesting living here. I've experienced things I never heard of before like atmospheric rivers and frozen air masses. 

I got out for a walk. It really does help, and I need the help. It's just hard to get myself together to do it, though I usually and happy when I do. 

Nothing New Under the Sun

It is a cold, somewhat blustery day. I haven't wanted to move far from under the covers. So I have been knitting. I had an idea to create my own pattern.  I got it while watching all the YouTube train videos. I was captivated by some of the hats that I saw. I thought about it a lot while I was actually on the train, but I finished the hats that I was already working on. That is a different pattern that I worked on and can call my own. 

The hat that I am working on has a doubled ribbing, that I figured out myself how to accomplish and staggered knitting and purling for the body of the hat. I want it to be roomy, so I started by casting on thirty or so more stitches than I normally do. 

I was getting kind of antsy about the dimensions so I went to Ravelry to look at other similar hats. Doing that I found a pattern called Wurm by katushika that is almost identical to what I'm going for. I downloaded it, and read it. It is remarkably similar to what I'm doing. I will finish the hat, but will have to think of improvements and tweeks to make it a copywritable and saleable pattern. This is the problem I have been having. There really isn't anything new under the sun with a craft that has been around almost as long as it's been shining. How other people call a basic pattern theirs is kind of astonishing to me. This hat has some styling and techniques that can easily make it more amenable to calling the pattern hers. But still, without seeing her pattern first, I was doing a close copy of it. 

Cheese and the tree are still with us.

 

Life In These United States

 

I have started cooking meals for the animals. This isn't a first time for me, but the first time was a period of extreme emotional duress for me. This time is just a time of need. 

My brother decided before I even moved here that manufactured dog food was poison for dogs. Please don't ask me to explain. He just did. Then my sister added an ever increasing list of vegetables and spices that dogs shouldn't have. Interestingly enough was that the list was almost identical to the list she doesn't care for. It didn't matter, the dog's diet got ever restricted. It had worked itself to balogna or peanut butter sandwiches. It was never my choice, until recently when came to a head. We had cooked porkchops on the grill (in the snow), and Bear attacked the plate coming in. He does not have either aggression or food insecurity issues, so this was a first for him. After a family counsel, it was decided that I can cook nutricious meals for him. My sister has decided that she can contribute a nutricious biscuit for a snack for him. It worked. He loves the meals, but the cats love it too. A good thing because cat food has disappeared off the shelves. 

So, I am taking walks, cooking for animals and watching a cat die under the dead tree in my living room. With all the sarcasm of a recalcitrant teen, Life is Good...

Lacking Patience for Fools

I leave off talking with my extended family to my sister. She’s more diplomatic than I am. So she has been the one talking to the Aunts about Cindy’s death.  I wish I could be surprised by their reaction. They are all shocked and saddened by the news,but they also try to justify their or their children’s decision to remain virus bait. Some make sketchy claims that they don’t need it because they have had Covid, it was like a mild cold. It seems to be COVID’s version of “I got the flu shot once and it gave me the flu” lie. I can’t talk to them anymore.

Cheese is still dying under the dead tree.

Back to It

 

I have been trying to ease myself back into daily walks. It has been difficult. The infection was bad and took a lot out of me. But ice was still on the sidewalks the first time I tried. I didn't get far, just to Main Street and back. I waited a few days and tried again. Even though the air temperature was spring like, the ground was still frozen. I got a little farther, but had to turn around because my feet were frozen and numb. 

My walk today was the first time I felt myself getting stronger. The temperature is in the 40's and the ground is still extremely cold and wet. The walk was chillier than I expected it to be. But I persisted. I was helped along by the mood of the neighborhood. It's Friday afternoon, everyone is relaxing happily into the weekend. I could tell it in the playfulness of the teens who were getting out of the high school. 

Today I felt stronger. Being outside the bubble of my house felt good. The forecast is for cold, but dry weather for the next week or so. Maybe I will be able to see the mountain.

An Explanation, Sort Of...

 

My sister was watching a Tru-Crime type story on the television in the living room. It's what she watches now, because watching the news is bad for our mental health. I walked in the room to see the image of a mom and dad visiting a son in jail, being all supportive and encouraging. Then Karen told me that the son was in jail because he had laid in wait to murder his whole family. He killed his sister, but the parents came home together and he didn't think he could take them both on together. I was galled, and astonished. But then Karen compared the situation to a friend of ours who has a son in jail for murder. And I thought about another friend who was in a similar situation. Even though our friends children didn't try to kill them. I don't judge or condemn them for loving these people who did unthinkable wrong. 

So that's kind of it in a nutshell. I have noticed that I tend to spout off on a subject without giving it a full thought. It was terrible that parents should support the person who tried to kill them, and did kill their daughter. But it was reasonable for my friends to love their horribly errant sons. Who am I to judge anyway? It is this realization that has kept me quiet for a while on this blog, this and other issues. But I've gotten to where I don't want to express a view, because I am afraid that it is inherently flawed. So instead, I say nothing at all. 

Hello Again...

If you are here because you follow this blog, you are a true friend. One that I have proven that I really don't deserve. But I am so glad that you haven't given completely up on me. And I thank you for that. 

Well now, it has been quite a winter so far. Though I can't say as much for the new year. Truth be told, it's beginning to ring in as a 2020 redux.

I spent the entire fall compulsively over-planning my great Christmas train trip. I watched every YouTube video I could find, scouring them for tips, anything really that would help me survive two long trips on very full trains. I got way too many tips, most of which involved purchasing brand specific items. Of course, they did offer helpful links "in the descriptions below" to allow me to order the item. They just get a pittance of a kickback for sending me to the site. I did finally downsize the list of hints into a workable packing plan. My research paid off, I did a fair job of packing for the train.

The train is not as glamorous as Amtrak ads would have you believe. They could improve this considerably if they could convince their employees that customer service is an important attribute. They tend to bark, yell and threaten instead of requesting firmly. They seemed to be of the opinion that it was the passenger's fault that they were overbooked, understaffed and understocked. Customer service snafu's were common, including and attendant with his mask hanging under his nose telling a passenger to put on a mask while the passenger was actively eating. (not me, but I did witness it.) 

All that being said, train travel on Amtrak Coach is better than air travel if for no other reason than to miss TSA checks. The seats are comfortable and roomy. There is a small amount of space to store travelling essentials. There are electrical outlets. Passengers are not confined to their seats, there are other cars to visit. The scenery was beautiful beyond my imagination. I actually had to keep telling myself that I was actually witnessing the outright majesty I was seeing. It. Was. Incredible. I am sold on it. I plan to travel on Amtrak, hopefully extensively this spring, summer and autumn. That is another point, train travel is incredibly cheap. I can afford a couple of trips across the country,

When I left Seattle a few days before Christmas, The weather was warm, but everything was festive. We actually had a fairly socially distanced Christmas parade to start the holiday off. We were decorated nicely. But Cheese, who started actively dying in the fall, took up residence under the tree. He does not have control of anything below his front shoulders anymore. But my sister has been keeping him cleaned and alive, she refuses to put him down. I defer to her, but I'm not enabling it. So, my brother and sister entertained Christmas with a dying cat under the tree. Typing it out, it rings of a storyline from "Christmas Vacation". And I am laughing hysterically as I am typing it. It is funny if it isn't happening in your living room. 

It didn't snow in Chicago. All Chicagans told me  that was a blessing because the snow there is brown and not pretty. But it did snow in Seattle, beginning the day after Christmas and continuing until after I got home on December 29. I got off the train feeling like I was exhausted and walking through a dream, just a feeling of disconnection. My sister had taken down all the Christmas decorations and stripped the tree down, but left it in the living room because Cheese is so attached to it. The assumption is that Cheese will die soon and we can dispose of the tree after he is gone. But for now, we have a dying cat under a dead tree in our house. It's the stuff that comedy routines are made up of.

I woke up early on New Year's Eve because my arm had become painful while I was sleeping. I dreamed that I pulled a muscle while lifting my backpack. Sometime during the night I developed cellulitis and it was quickly spreading down my arm. I went to the ER and received excellent care, but the infection has taken me all of the new year to heal from. During this time, Cheese attacked Karen and injured her hand which promptly became infected. So we have both started the year with a bang.  But even with me traipsing off on a cross country vacation during a pandemic and us decorating with a dying cat under the tree, we were not the butt of the family gossip circle. 

My niece was a bible thumping Trumpster from Tennessee. Her church told her that the Covid vaccines have a microchip in them that is the Mark of the Beast. She unfriended me on Facebook because I pointed out to her the Mark of the Beast will be taken as a loyalty brand to show support for the anti-christ and the one world government. Since the anti-christ is not presently in power and the world governments still stand sovereign the Mark of the Beast does not yet exist. The micro-chip she fears will expose to the government everywhere she's been and where she shops is in her cell phone. Her daughter almost died of Covid over the summer, and we thought for sure she would realize the severe folly of believing the lie, but not so. She spouted Q-Anon conspiracy theories left and right as to why she shouldn't listen to reason. 

She and her family spent Christmas with her mother in Georgia. Her husband arrived with symptoms, and since there are at risk people in the house, they were asked to take a test. Her husband tested positive and was asked to isolate himself in an upstairs room. When he refused to comply, and was called out for it, they left in a huff. We heard that he went into the hospital on New Years Day. Cindy was admitted a few days later. As concerned as I was, I was also furious with them. It wasn't merely that they were careless with themselves, they put everyone else in jeopardy with them. My niece died on Tuesday. I am still too angry. I'm sure I will grieve someday. I wonder if a wrongful death suit can be filed against the church. The power of poor choices...

And we still have a dying cat under a dead tree in the living room. 

 

Summer Round-Up

I find it totally unacceptable that I have to read my own blog to find what the last thing I wrote about. I never plan to close the blog and disappear, but that is in essence what happens. 

The summer has been busy. Quite a lot has happened. As noted in the post from a few months ago we strong-armed the slum lord into fixing the roof. Our plan was to deep clean the house afterward. But first we survived the Seattle heat wave. It was no joke. We made it through by covering ourselves and our animals with wet towels and drinking Gatorade. It's seems like we are complaining excessively about it. But it really was a serious event. Our roads buckled in the heat and the glaciers melted off the mountain.

The following weekend our friend, Sue came to visit. I will probably write about her at some point. She is a real character. This visit was followed quickly by our Family Vacation to Ft. Worden. We stayed at the state park this year instead of the farm. We loved the NCO housing at the fort. To Army brats like us, it was like a visit home. But like so many things, many of the attractions and shops are still closed for Covid. But Sue joined us for the first day and then another friend, Sandy came for the rest of our stay. We enjoyed the beach, the beautiful surroundings, worked puzzles and ate great sea food and just generally had a relaxing time of fellowship. It is really is nice that we have two affordable and enjoyable places to stay there. It is one of our favorite places.

But for me, the best part of the summer was my birthday present from Mollie and Chris. This year they gave me a present of their presence. They flew over from Chicago to celebrate with me. I had four whole days with them and their only request was to let them know they weren't in Chicago anymore. Easy peasy in Washington State. This place is a type A overperformer when it comes to raw beauty. Add the Museum of Glass, Pike Place Market, The Lindwood Troll and a trip through the passes, well I think they knew they were in a different place. 

But the best gift is one that I don't think they understood they were giving me. They have invited me to visit over Christmas. I am so excited. I was disappointed after I flew here more than two years ago. I felt that I had wasted the entire trip because there is this whole beautiful country and I flew over it. I didn't really get to see it. So I will remedy it. I have purchased a ticket on Amtrak's Empire Builder. I will see  the Lewis and Clark trail and Glacier National Park on my way to Chicago. I will be taking the California Zephyr and the Costal Starlight on the way home. It will allow me to see large swaths of the country. It will have me on trains for a total of 5 nights, and I'm a little worried about personal distancing. But I am vaccinated for Covid and the flu and will get a booster before I go if they are available. I will keep my mask on and douse myself with hand sanitizer. What could go wrong? Still, it is amazing what having something I'm excited about and looking forward to has done for my mental health. 

So, I am sorry that once again I have neglected you. I will make no promises, but you may be where I write incessantly about my excitement and upcoming travels.

This Old House...

We pay a price for the autonomy we enjoy in this house. We rent it from a slum-lord. 

We have six cats and a dog who is a pitt-rotty mix. I can't imagine that we could find another house to live in. But over-all the place is benefitting from us living here. The cats are mousers. Living beside a railroad track, that's important. They are abundantly adept at keeping the rodent population of the entire neighborhood down. The dog is his own story. He only looks scary. He doesn't have to be scary because nobody bothers us here. The house from the outside looks like one you would break out of, not in to.

Many years ago my brother and sister were both poor and desperate when they moved in. From what my siblings tell me it was a filthy, horror house dump when SL was showing it. The deal they struck was that SL would leave siblings alone and siblings would pay SL somewhat on time every month. Writing it down that way makes it sound like SL got taken, but not so. Karen and Ken cleaned, painted and repaired the house to make it livable and comfortable. It is in much better shape than when SL was attempting to rent it on Craig's List. 

The main disfiguring scar on the house has been the roof. The abandoned satellite dish that was attached had caused such a leak that four years ago the ceiling fell into the laundry room. SL had someone give him an estimate to repair the roof and decided to only repair the ceiling in the laundry room. The leak was repaired by placing a tarp over that portion of the roof and holding it down with large stones. You can see them on the street view of the house on Google Maps. Heck, you can see them as you  pass on the interstate that runs beside the property. SL has no shame. I have wondered if the obvious disrepair wasn't some kind of badge of accomplishment among his peers. We could have had shame too, but the cheaper rent, and the animals, and everyone leaving the old people alone was a boon to us, and no one actually 'lives' in the laundry room.

We limped along, ignoring the elephant for the full two years that I have been here. The tarp did better than expected. It prolonged the inevitable by years. The laundry room ceiling has fallen again. We began discussing how we were going to bring it up to SL when SL informed us of a huge rent increase. He made and excuse, saying that it was due to increases in taxes and insurance. By the time Karen told Ken and I about the increase she had already answered SL. She told him the same thing that was the first to come out of our mouths too; fix the roof. 

On Monday he sent out a man named Rodgers to look at it. Rodgers had been the man who fixed the ceiling without fixing the roof four years ago. He agreed the roof needed to be repaired before the ceiling and took the message back to SL. On Tuesday SL texted Karen that the roof repairs would begin on Wednesday. 

Rodgers came back earlier than we imagined he would. He was on the roof stripping away the old tiles by 8:00 am. He left shortly after noon to return the next day. He has been back every morning since. He is working rather slowly. 

Karen had been panicked that SL would kick us out because of the new roof. But Rodgers says no. SL is only replacing the shingles, not the rotting wood beneath them. He's doing it on the cheap because he does not have enough sense to do it right the first time, and he's watching his pennies.  Rodgers says that not many of SL's other tenants are paying due to the eviction moratorium. That will be ending soon, so he either needs us because we are paying or because soon he will have to decide on evicting the non-payers. Either way, we are the only tenants SL is benefitting from at the moment. When I write it, I kind of feel bad for SL. But he could have fixed the roof four years ago when it would have been cheaper, when it was the obvious better choice than he made. We have no choice but to see if it was worth worrying over. Nobody wants to move; the place fits us now that the roof is fixed. So if he leaves it as it is, and the roof holds out we will probably stay.

Anne Marie

I am still feeling shocked and sad about the loss of Anne Marie. I miss her comments and her concern for Cheese. Funny thing about the internet, we can care about people we never really meet. We see only the portion of the person that they choose to show us. That view can be deceptive. But on blogs, I don't think it is most of the time. I liked the person she told me she was, and I will miss her.

The breast cancer support chat group that I was in used to have dedicated chats for the members we lost along the way. They were very cathartic for those of us who live in the shadow of recurrence. I can't imagine how something like that could work here. It just does seem we should mark her passing.